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Mormonen-Krimineller gegen Transe

Nigel Coleman aus dem englischen Swindon hatte einen Mann brutal
zusammengeschlagen - und wurde dafür von einem Gericht zu zwei Monaten
Gefängnis verurteilt. Jetzt hat der 47-Jährige, der seine Tat gestanden
hat, Widerspruch gegen das Urteil eingelegt. Grund: Seine
Polizei-Gutachterin war eine Transsexuelle - und mit ihr wollte er nicht
reden.
“Er konnte nicht verstehen, warum jemand, der eine so große Sünde
begangen hat, ihm helfen könne, seine Sünden aufzuarbeiten”, so Martin
Guyll-Wiggins, Colemans Anwalt, gegenüber der BBC. “Mein Mandant meinte,
der Beamte war lediglich ein Mann in einem Kleid. Er ist davon
überzeugt, dass Transsexualität eine Sünde ist.” Das Gericht folgte
dieser Ansicht nicht: Es nannte die Argumentation des Mormonen
“diskriminierend” und verurteilte ihn ohne ein Gutachten - denn in
Großbritannien ist seit diesem Jahr die Diskriminierung Transsexueller
in Großbritannien verboten. Guyll-Wiggins erwiderte darauf, dass nicht
die Gutachterin sondern sein Mandant diskriminiert worden sei - wegen
dessen religiöser Ansichten. Coleman habe “seelische Probleme”, die in
einem Gutachten angesprochen und vom Gericht anerkannt werden müssten,
so Guyll-Wiggins weiter. “Weil kein Gutachten erstellt worden ist, wurde
der Geisteszustand meines Mandanten nicht berücksichtigt.”
Die mormonische Sekte (offizieller Titel: “Kirche Jesu Christi der
Heiligen der letzten Tage”) hat weltweit elf Millionen Mitglieder. Sie
wurde im Jahre 1830 im heutigen US-Staat Utah gegründet und beruht
sowohl auf der Bibel als auch auf dem vom Kirchengründer Joseph Smith
verfassten Buch Mormon, das biblische Geschichten auf den amerikanischen
Kontinent verlegt. (dk) 11. Oktober 2004, 15:22 Uhr

Translation:

Mormon criminal against Tranny

Nigel Coleman from the English Swindon had beaten up a man brutally, and
was sentenced by a court for this to two months in prison. The
47-year-old has now, has confessed his deed to the Contradiction
inserted against the verdict. Reason: A transwoman was his police
expert, and he didn’t want to talk with her.
“He couldn’t understand why somebody which committed such a big sin it
can help him to process his sins “, as Martin Guyll Wiggins, Coleman’s
advocate said to the BBC. “My client thought the official was merely a
man in a dress. He is convinced that transsexualism is a sin.” The court
didn’t follow this view: It called the argumentation of the Mormon as
“discriminatory” and sentenced him without a report - because the
discrimination of transsexuals has been forbidden in Great Britain in
since this year. Guyll-Wiggins replied to it that the expert hasn’t been
discriminated - but his client because of the religious views. Coleman
has “mental problems” which must be mentioned in a report and
appreciated by the court, said Guyll-Wiggins. “Because no report has
been prepared, the mental condition of my client wasn’t taken into
account.”
The Mormon sect (official title: “Church of Jesu Christ of Latter day
saints”) has worldwide eleven million members. This church was founded
in today’s U.S. state of Utah in 1830 and be based both on the Bible and
the book Mormon which was written by the church founder Joseph Smith,
which transfers biblical stories on the American continent . (dk)
October 11th, 2004, 03:22 p.m. (source: <http://www.queer.de/>
http://www.queer.de)

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

A view on equity for all – Keep it simple stupid

By Lee McInnis Gaetjens

PO Box 66471

Houston, Texas 77266-6471

(713) 578-0016

www. Leemcg . Com

mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com

Edna Is wrong for the reasons of over buracraay, big government and big business. We have to many laws, red tape in the legal, social service system. For example ever try and cut though federal government red tape, or state or local. Or the dmv or DPS or county tax collectors office. Do You deal with the federal government on a daily basis or the legal system than you know why.

The fact is the legal system is just as bad quite simply it should be illegal to discriminated for any reason, keep it simple stupid. We have to many amblanace chaser legal teams, those who defraud the federal government and those who lie cheat and steal and minuilplate the legal, social and our system and way of life in the united states of america.

Now a lot of proggress, growth and the world is vastly different in modern conviances, gadgents, and social and economic and conviance from when our fine country was founded. And even from the beginning of time and humanity, the birth of life, chirst, or evlouation. But much has not progressed in the way of religion, views, and well modern fiath or enlightment and the way and path of religion. 

People and humanity needs a spirtual view, which has lacked in the wonders of progess, from the stone age, to the bronse age, to the medevil times, to the industrial age, to the moren age and into the 21 centery.

We fear what we dont understand, when our belifs and views are wrong, and many people still feel gays, lesbains, bisexuals, transgenders. More accept gays and lesbians, transgender, transexual, intersexed, and gender queer, and agrongeus and male to females, female to males, drag queens, transvestites, crossdressers, drag kings, etc are the biggest and most deverse minoirpo in the glbt community and culutre as a whole, and often misudnerstood. 

EDNA is wrong because, we need equity for all not just some, labels or sterotypes, we just need flat out equil rights as in a *Mtf) womens or (ftm) mans place, people fear that do to the sex trade, pron industy , people think we try to fool folks are or nuts or insace, or possesed of the devil.

Religion and faith has not progressed, religion is often used to deny, cover up or for polical, social or economial gain, edna is wrong because of lawyears, religious lobbistys, and groups such as the kkk, neo-nazio and white suprepasist or confedarted or domestic terrositm groups.

WE have to much law on the books, all ready, we need to lobby to repeal laws, the world is vastly different for example in the state of texas you are supposed to be hung for carrying wire cutters in your back pocket (cattle russlers) 

We need to simplfiy law, stop frigilous lobbism and legasaltion and go to more simplistic, sim,ply it is illegal to discrimante to anyone for any reason in employment, education, housing, service, civic association, or personal or private debits.

Amblance chaseing dollar signs at car accidents, going after hollywoodf because the matrix made you kill, or going after fast food estblashments because of hot coffee being spilled in your lap. Going after a dry cleaers bfor 25 Million dollars because they ruined your 500 suit. 

If you cant bedazzle them with your brillance, than bedazzle them with your  bull-shit creative lies, deception and greed and revenge because you went to law school, fuck them all. The truth is we need less law, and big business and more open government not less, in simple terms keep it simple stupid.

Why EDNA is wrong for a Trans-womans prospective.

A view on equity for all – Keep it simple stupid

By Lee McInnis Gaetjens

PO Box 66471

Houston, Texas 77266-6471

(713) 578-0016

www. Leemcg . Com

mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com

Edna Is wrong for the reasons of over buracraay, big government and big business. We have to many laws, red tape in the legal, social service system. For example ever try and cut though federal government red tape, or state or local. Or the dmv or DPS or county tax collectors office. Do You deal with the federal government on a daily basis or the legal system than you know why.

The fact is the legal system is just as bad quite simply it should be illegal to discriminated for any reason, keep it simple stupid. We have to many amblanace chaser legal teams, those who defraud the federal government and those who lie cheat and steal and minuilplate the legal, social and our system and way of life in the united states of america.

Now a lot of proggress, growth and the world is vastly different in modern conviances, gadgents, and social and economic and conviance from when our fine country was founded. And even from the beginning of time and humanity, the birth of life, chirst, or evlouation. But much has not progressed in the way of religion, views, and well modern fiath or enlightment and the way and path of religion. 

People and humanity needs a spirtual view, which has lacked in the wonders of progess, from the stone age, to the bronse age, to the medevil times, to the industrial age, to the moren age and into the 21 centery.

We fear what we dont understand, when our belifs and views are wrong, and many people still feel gays, lesbains, bisexuals, transgenders. More accept gays and lesbians, transgender, transexual, intersexed, and gender queer, and agrongeus and male to females, female to males, drag queens, transvestites, crossdressers, drag kings, etc are the biggest and most deverse minoirpo in the glbt community and culutre as a whole, and often misudnerstood. 

EDNA is wrong because, we need equity for all not just some, labels or sterotypes, we just need flat out equil rights as in a *Mtf) womens or (ftm) mans place, people fear that do to the sex trade, pron industy , people think we try to fool folks are or nuts or insace, or possesed of the devil.

Religion and faith has not progressed, religion is often used to deny, cover up or for polical, social or economial gain, edna is wrong because of lawyears, religious lobbistys, and groups such as the kkk, neo-nazio and white suprepasist or confedarted or domestic terrositm groups.

WE have to much law on the books, all ready, we need to lobby to repeal laws, the world is vastly different for example in the state of texas you are supposed to be hung for carrying wire cutters in your back pocket (cattle russlers) 

We need to simplfiy law, stop frigilous lobbism and legasaltion and go to more simplistic, sim,ply it is illegal to discrimante to anyone for any reason in employment, education, housing, service, civic association, or personal or private debits.

Amblance chaseing dollar signs at car accidents, going after hollywoodf because the matrix made you kill, or going after fast food estblashments because of hot coffee being spilled in your lap. Going after a dry cleaers bfor 25 Million dollars because they ruined your 500 suit. 

If you cant bedazzle them with your brillance, than bedazzle them with your  bull-shit creative lies, deception and greed and revenge because you went to law school, fuck them all. The truth is we need less law, and big business and more open government not less, in simple terms keep it simple stupid.

]]> http://leemcg.com/wordpress/2007/11/01/why-edna-is-wrong-keep-it-simple-stupid-my-point-of-view/feed/ http://leemcg.com/wordpress/2007/10/30/crossposted-hrc-edna-acton-alert-houston-texas/ http://leemcg.com/wordpress/2007/10/30/crossposted-hrc-edna-acton-alert-houston-texas/#comments Tue, 30 Oct 2007 22:42:36 +0000 leemcg http://leemcg.com/wordpress/2007/10/30/crossposted-hrc-edna-acton-alert-houston-texas/ The Employment Non-Discrimination Act
We all want it…so how do we get it?

Want to find out the latest information and the inside scoop on
the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA)? Have you been
looking for a venue to speak your mind and to express to leaders
in the community what you think should be done?

Date: Thursday, November 1, 2007

Time: 6:30 p.m. to 8:30 p.m.

Location: Bering Memorial United Methodist Church, 1440 Harold
Street, Houston, TX 77006

Join the Human Rights Campaign, Houston Transgender Unity
Committee, Houston GLBT Political Caucus, Lambda Legal, Houston
GLBT Community Center, Houston Equal Rights Alliance, Equality
Texas and the American Civil Liberties Union of Texas for a
community town hall to discuss all of the issues and opinions
surrounding ENDA.

*Speakers will include Phyllis Frye, attorney, GLBT activist and
transgender pioneer
*Christopher Bacon, attorney and adjunct professor at the
University of Houston Law Center
*Mike Holloman and Jani Lopez from HRC’s Board of Governors

You have read the articles and blogs. You have heard the rumors.
This is your chance to hear from experts on the issue, ask the
questions you want answered and let your voice be heard.

www.leemcg.com

Operation Apartment Snoops
by Rodger Jacobs
August 1, 2002

Do you feel safe and secure in your humble domicile? When you lock the door and draw the blinds at night do you derive comfort from the knowledge that you – and whatever secrets you may harbor: criminal, immoral or otherwise – are safe from prying eyes? Well, if you rent an apartment, condo, or town home you may need to rethink just how private your life is in this panic-stricken, paranoia-driven, post September 11 United States of America. We’re talking about Operation Apartment Snoops – a rather unimaginative euphemism I have invented for what one well-placed source on the east coast tells me is “a voluntary program” wherein the FBI and the Department of Justice (DOJ) are enlisting landlords and apartment managers across the country to take a gander inside the four walls of your rental dwelling.

McInnis Lee Gaetjens

Po Box 66471

Houston, Texas 77266-6471

09/30/07

My early child hood when my mother lead my father, I moved back to the southern states during this time the year of 1983. My father than came in and out of AA and the program.

My early childhood memories are odd and obscure, I always felt out of place, confused like I did not belong or something wasn’t right or I wasn’t right. Somethings Missing out of place, one of my early st memories is around age 3 or 4 or 5 or so when moving back to the south from the bay area. My early sit childhood memories my mother was hard on me, my mother fought often with my right-wing grandmother, my mother was as full of panic and disorder and drama and unhappy as I am now.

But one of my early memories of being out of place, or wrong on not much myself, is when I was little one of my first happy memories is playing with someone posing for a coffin and someone else and doing other odd things for my mothers lawyer whom she made life difficult for my dad in recovery, played games and also given the fact my father grew up in New York City and didn’t drive for many years and still doesn’t largely. She moved things made things hard for him in a cab, and bus service. He stayed at the YMCA given his early soberer.

I hallways felt out of place in early childhood one of my closet early friends and only given my mothers overly protective, paranoia, OCD upbring and excessive and obscure childhood I had and lack of socialization and allowing me to grow out of fear of my big evil father or the big bad bully, my mother often isolated me and didn’t let me develop or grow due to paranoia and overly promotive and unreality goals and lacked to give me any independence and or freedom or enjoy simple childhood pleasures.

Anyway one of my first memories beyond my acting and flower and dead thing for my moms legal assistant or witness or noter that was present for dealings related to the divorce and custody dispute whom she bashed my father, who cleaned up and she made his life very difficult. Was my great uncle HJM (Hugh Judge McAuliffe) whom was a very hard ass old timer with the big car, johnny cash fan, and more very conservative right wing stubborn piggish, but to make a long story short, urning this time he lived with my aunt AM (allice mcaullife) and my cousins (Christiana arbor and her friends would come over after school and My gender exploration began there but also in of all places the old timers sears catalogs I would spend hours on ends, fantasying of being a girl starching into sears catalogs for hours on end.

In other new my family never really thought I developed much into a boyish or boyish, I devloped more trying to fit in though my latter teen and young adult years though blue shirt america. And runing around with blue shirt labor groups.

While being pushed for acting out, or being left in a tree, or being pushed into games or activities of logic or being pushed into things or activity’s my over protective mother would disapprove with HJM AM DLG (Daniel lee gay) or PMG (Patrica McAuliffe Gay) that I could get away more with murder or things were not allowed.

Further more though my twisted family, religious twists, personal issues and screwed up childhood, and struggling since I was 5 years old with the sears fantasy and long hours in the bathroom reading but with the catalog.

The reality is I have grown beyond that years of suffering and denial I hurt, badly for denying myself vocal opinion, I never knew in Overly protected religious secular right upbringing that there was a thing as Gender Identity and Transsexuals or much more than I converted to The Latter Day Saint faith, and did self-destructive actions to others. And doing distributive things to my life. I used work, over-work, and buying my temporary happiness, for example my pickup-truck, vacations, travels were just temporary fixes, than one night while in fear to go home, I was invited to and discovered bar hopping and drinking and the wonders of medication and cure with drinking in Houston.

I hated drunks, in my early to later teen years was around sub stand abuse, drinking after I left my folks, in early child-hood I was cultured, middle to upper class, and knew so much and than started to well work hard and be someone I wasn’t though backbreaking, hard manual labor, self drive and self-reservation I worked myself to death, Had faith in something to cure my feelings, and destroyed my life. Eventfully upon Transferring to Houston. I over-worked and burned out when I worked for a manger named Ray Gonzales who cleaned houses of un-profitable stores for my company, was a big wig in the woodlands, and more paranoid and dysfunctional and rumored despite being a big wig right wing rep, married and with kids and a die hard right wing ultra-Conservative roman catholic was gay, but lived a double life with customers and employees and his number two co-manager was rumored to be gay. And half the store was GLBT on various levels some more out than others further adding to my fears of

To further complicate things my Transfer here was less than joyful, the company was going through hard times the stock price was down a Hireling freeze was in effect. Corners were being cut everywhere the infamous movie was being filmed, the tire and lube people were being split across the board drowning the end. And in worse fashion the people who when I was finally promoted after spending a summer outdoors alone 90% of the time working in the hottest summer in Houston with a burn ban.

I got promoted to a worse job inside, in an abusive hard and verbally and physically abusive era in the workplace, at home, and blackmailed and extorted and set up. And shortly afterward discovered drinking after my home, house and insecurity’s were invited.

I than after becoming hurt at work, burned out and with my poor conduit discovered and preferred drinking drama, and physically and verbally abusive relationships, I further destroyed myself by terroristic law enforcement, citizens, and being hostile to getting help, and hate, racism given the people who abused me largely were black and has panic, I was the token white back there, they later found out one night about me attending mcc, when they beat me up off property and I hid and hid and hit with one of the letters you gave me. I had an alarm event (police panic at my old apartment) when they beat me up there, and rattled the window and vandalized my truck on a few occasions, abused, and intimated me in the community to try and get terroristic actions out of me, when I could no longer do so, I cared little about my life, hit the bottle club, debit, bills, and work became lacking, I bitched and bitched and bitch about life but did little to further it, I further terrorized the local community and others friends family members and acquaintances by doing self-destructive actions, lieing, drinking and using people than pushing them away from me destroying the relationships and ruining my life, and eventfully my scholarship for collage to fulfill my life long dream.

I still often miss my family, friends and former people who cared and try to help

I was born Jan 18th, 1981 to my parents Martin Clark Gaetjens & Kathryn Kathleen McInnis Gay McAuliffe at Kaiser foundation Hospital, at 2:03 am i n the morning PST. I was a quick and emergency c-section I was blue due to lack of air to the brain and a Emergency C-section but alive and in good spirits regardless of the cord being warped around my neck 3 times. I was born in the era before ultrasounds were norm, or mainstream, when blood work took hours, and you didn’t have wide spread computers and before databases, the Internet and digital Lifestyle and cell phones, PDAs and pagers, FAX machines and blackberry’s were the part of every day life, before 24 hour cable news, I remember the 80s of my childhood. its who I am and my favorite time and a the end of a simpler era before the big tech boom.

I was born Jan 18th, 1981 to lovering good parents who in conflict used me to fight and split located at Kaiser Foundation Hospital in Oakland, CA. My Mother was Born and Raised in New Orleans, Louisiana as My dad was born and raised in New York City, New York State.

I was born at approx. 2:03 AM (PST) a traumatic birth, I was kicking and had swung myself around again, it was fast approaching my time to join the world, in the early 1980s (the birth of the digital age was still in infancy) Ultrasounds, cat scans and things we take for granted and sometimes love and love to hate were reserved for the few and elite and very very expensive, pricey and not covered by my mothers and fathers insurance and largely viewed as a novelty medical device due to the limited availability, the high cost of computer power and digital imaging ( we are still in the dark ages and the birth though not boom of personal computing)

I had turned myself around and My life might be in danger, my mother had to choose to wait for X-rays (you still used film and the process took time you had to manually develop in those days and have a actually tech not a computer do the work for you the days of skilled labor, and unions were still here) My mothers gut and parenting instinct told her to go into labor, and not wait for the tests which was a very good thing, I was an emergency C-section at the time (modern medicine of the late 70s and early 80s discouraged c-sections) I was born blue and not breathing but early Regan era medicine saved my life.

I had a childhood of conflict, my mother had left New Orleans fairly liberal in the 1960s, my uncle (who later became more my father figure my moms brother) left for Texas, which I would later follow in his footsteps. My father is very far left liberal and new York can be more right wing left the slums of the Bronx which was different from today and people like jerry orbach and others grew up in the Bronx in his era.

My mother moved around the west coast Portland, or, Richmond, ca when (I was born) redneck town in a blue state. Same with Houston and Texas there is blue you just have to know where to look much more blue than in New Orleans.

My mom left my father and came back 3 times before going to separation, My father had a drinking problem and as a child there is much to be disputed (it sucks when parents bring the kids into the equation) I honestly believe after uncovering things during my mothers death that she was to blame as much as My dad, they were different people who were not right for each other but tried to do the best for me but the blood and booze spilled.

I have felt conflict with my gender from a very young age roughly beginning around age 3-5 years of age, which begins my separating my parent’s fights and ultimately leading to going home to sweet old Harvey, Louisiana in Jefferson parish.

I think my earliest memory is I always as a younger child fit in more with the girls, and latter was more obscure from a lack of socializing and overly protective mother, afraid of my father and others (allegedly he sent a P.I. to hunt us down or a hit man or some bullshit) I think parents out of bad digressions do bad and stupid things, I feel my father gave up, and my mother shut him out, they both did their parts to hurt and lie on each other, and hurt me in the process.

I had a rough childhood, history of dalliance, good upbringing, my family has a large catholic background, and my mom quit practicing, and also had much conflict with my grandmother in my early childhood, and young adult hood and early pre-teen years.

I was subjected to beatings punishments for my arrogances and stupidity and destructive and obscene and profanity and sinful actions in my youth. I had been beaten, and even was called evil and sinful.

I think a lot of parents want to protect their children but I was overly protected and overly sheltered in my youth to the point of being naive though young adult-hood and even into adulthood partially.

I think my first remembrance of feeling like a girl, was when I was 3 or 5 so years old when my mother returned here and was “hiding” from my big evil dad. With her atty and lawyer in my family’s “empty” that my mom, my uncle and (adopted sister) were raised in house uptown New Orleans in Broadmor which some may know better given its coverage during Katrina.

We were in there waiting for my dad to show up. I think my mom often played games with my father and wanted to win custody and wanted out of the marriage out of poor taste, unhappiness, or homesickness, or maybe wanting the best for me. I believe to some degree my father wanted the best for me but gave up, I don’t trust nor distrust him to much today, but he is my flesh and blood and we share some similar DNA.

I think my father sometimes says one thing but actions, and words and cause and effect, as my mother was just as equity guilty in a lot of my life as were many other people.

My memory goes to some point of waiting for a lawyer, I think she had a little girl with her or her nanny stopped by to see her or something (cell phones were rare, pricey and prestige to yuppies, millionaires and drug dealers and generally installed in cars with the like curry cord most people or working class doctors, cops, fire ems used pagers and pay phones in those days if you could afford one or be issued one)

Regardless I think we played some or it may have been a neighbor, it was fun and enjoyable, I think I played dead and held a rose some sort of neo-Gothic romance thing blah. And look at me today.

Regardless as I grew up I got in trouble, but was generally moralistic, but acted out a lot, I had a troubled child hood, which I would later find out to have suffered brain damage at birth to the left frontal lobe, I also I think the local Houston company Medtronic’s was to a trail which never met FDA approval to try and repair my damaged brain nodes but failed and they still struggle the FDA does not conceder it safe and an elective surgery. I also struggled with speech and being or having social contact due to a very overly protective mother.

Moving forward I go to the school years, I fit in but was often alone and troubled an unhappy youth, I did sometimes in early childhood play with girls and make friends, and even had a few kiddies’ girl friends in childhood. Blah. Obscurity the house where she lived across from were I played as a kiddle was and still is there she was a army brat and where my school was now stands some yuppie new homes as about built in my high school years.

I trough pre-teen and young adult hood and early to mid childhood started gender bending as some would call and even ado lance. My family “caught” me a member as a child never spoke to it to others but did beat me well for doing such a “wrong” thing. I had a more ultra-right wing conservative GREAT-uncle not the uncle who was like my father he was more like a grandfather but very stubborn and right wing.
I had a great-aunt who growing up was like a grandmother but she was much older than my grandmother, and my grandmother kept her youth in appearance even to today to some degree despite her health problems.

I also began watching other girls wishing I could be them but In puzzlement did not understand given my right wing upbringing and roots, in south east Louisiana. I found a new self-reflection but in utter puzzlement, I spent some of my youth at night going to sleep dreaming of waking up in a new body, something about that felt right and something about what was wrong is now and that is correct. But things of that nature are taboo and get your ass kicked but religious right wing zealots, My mother was ok with long hair, but others did not like it and wanted nothing to do with me unless I cut it, did not like playing and ran firm 1920s discipline. I had a slightly though good natured loving side, but with turmoil inner I had a destructive, rebellious side sort of a Mr. Hyde and miss nice gal personality or something of that nature.

Even to this day, with my nice outgoing, caring giving personality, very friendly and trusting and stubborn and procrastinator self, it hides my true self, for so many years my hard work, risk taking, warehousing, and taking dumb risks and dumb luck I tired for all to hard and long to be a man, sure I may have attended glbt support groups, I converted to LDS or Mormonism as its commonly known to deny my own true self.

While I had searched for some peace within myself, I often wanted more and joined for the wrong reasons, I agree LDS folk are good kind, trustworthy folks but lost and misguided.

I remember in my young adulthood 18+ being misguided. And my mother and I and with my family rocky relationship and after her death 2 weeks after 9-11-2001 on my uncles birthday on September 25th that same year of the infamous terrorist attacks. Which ironically by birth and coming out and also becoming a terrorist myself or according to the state of Texas would be on the same year.

I’m very weary of dates, places, and parts to my life, and family. Given the past 3 deaths in my family have been on relatives birthdays. I lost and loose a lot for myself, and life.

I often find and even growing up secretly continued my cross-dressing, but as adalonace hit in I often tried the hardest to fit in and for many many years hid my true feelings about my true self, this is almost 10 years lieing to myself and trying to forget and hide myself or do a cure for all and pretend to be a real, man. I was not or will ever be.

I later in teenage years became very obese I over ate became unhappy, with myself, my body, my gender and my sexuality something felt broken I felt wrong sinful and shameful, joining the Latter Day Saint (Mormon) church made me feel worse.

I often even under the silly jokes and even today with my outgoingness live a dark, twisted depressed and lonely and unhappy life to this date.

I further have the foresight of being born in the early digital age, when tech was still well not as widespread in everyday life and living as is today, manual pricing guns were common place, the day before the infamous UPC codes and development of the digital age, when telephone calling was new, 900, 976 numbers were the big deal as far as scams the Internet had not grown outside the think tanks, university’s, and corporate networks and government and civil servants, and on line services like Gene, Compuserve, etc were the big deal.

Mobile phones were per minute, leased and if lucky bought. And amongst the privileged and powerful and developed . In other development the life I lived and grew was myself and growing into true self shows today, stuck behind a 300 baud dumb terminal, or if lucky an ISDN line or leased government line and access to FAX machines and older drum built like a tank copy machines were commonplace.

The world developed much and fast into myself, and boredom, I read into books, available my life is grown into a cesspool of faith, power and development.

My time in Houston was well intentioned, but I burned out and maybe wasn’t ready and the drink, dance, club and bottle and smoke became my medication for almost the entire 2.5 years in Texas.

I spent My life most of my life doing, pretending to fit in, crossed lines and boundaries and myself, my self-steam pretending, believing something I am not and living as someone I am not, when I burned out with my job, forklift accident, work, and abuse and personal insecurity I learned to be myself, become myself through the bottle and cesspool of booze and grow into the bottle for myself and others and to become myself and grew so much that booze became life, thats how I accepted my transgenderism with large quantity of drinking, acting out wanting to be put down in insecure with myself drinking, being hit, relieving pain, and reality from fact from fiction and becoming a compulsive lier.

I spent some of my young adult hood into obesity and foot and buying my happiness, others though work, my pickup truck, endless or useless tasks or chores and projects I never completed, other times in blowing, fantasy land like my sears catalog days, other days just on line. Dreaming, Houston was a new me. And I was working toward it, but ruined it and cant live here. Even on occasion in Montreal I cross paths with painful memories and choices I made here and some who abused me or May have further enjoyed abusive relationships. Some Might be dead, some are dead some are in and out.

In other news, I grew, into myself, sobered up in county jail, memories and faces and pain came back and off. I grew and blew. And than quit being less of compulsive lier and trusted, loved someone again some one first as myself. Went to meetings, and continue to grow, bleed, love, birth, and suffer to grow into enlightenment, and my true self.

I’m 26, I live in Houston, Texas (Montrose) I am a only child, my mother died 2 weeks after September 11,th 2001 (spet 25) on my uncles birthday. I’m transgender I have felt this way seince I was 3 or 5 years old. I did not fully understand such things till my teen years, and over protective and ultra-consertive upbringing. I had a rough, unhappy childhood. Nevertheless, was razed by good catholic folks even though my mom never practiced even I didn’t in my upbringing. I was never religious growing up but had LDS folks and also even to my early childhood, some missionaries visited my folks I had a great uncle and great aunt who were like my grandparents in my upbringing. (not the same uncle father figure that was my mother’s brother)

I had a rough and unhappy childhood and upbringing. I moved around a lot, broke down, and I was born a Tramatic birth, Blue Brain, I was an emegency c-section and spent some of my early few mounts In a Peidratic ICU. I tuned out ok, I studdered sometimes and struggled thorugh my childhood do to my brain dammage to my left frontal lobe, but latter in my adult life turned out more or less O.K.

I’m transgender I’m out as such and in early transition stages, I came out to my folk’s family and church members. I made bad choices. I also like ham radio, computers and IT and engineering and learning and photography, travel and writing. And 4×4 diesel pickup trucks and rvs, cooking, bbq, grilling, health, fitness, books, indie films, horror films, action films and sci-fi.

I have many friends, aquainces but urn for something more than drinking friends, I am outgoing, friendly and trusting but honestly very lonely and sad behind all My cheerful joy and outgoing and kind deeds.

I like gothic, ind music, 80s music, some country (reminds me of mom), classic rock (another childhood reminds me of my uncle) 80s hair bands, metal, electronic dance music, techno, old classic country, jazz, classical music and synth-pop, and live bands.

I spend a bit of my free time in coffee shops, diners, bars, bowling alleys, museums, pool halls, the park, and rooftops of big buildings. I have a passion for art, digital art, photography, writing, and blogging and web design.

Myself I prefer monogamous relationships, commitment, family and one day would like children of my own, I have a huge heart for the homeless and down on their luck, I often am known to give them leftovers from food at work and those being released from the (many) jails in town. I would give anything to experience childbirth but it will never happen.

I do care about others mainly GLBT youth, Trans-youth and Youth of any GLBT with a LDS background. I know what its like to be rough, on the streets; I know what it means to go through tough times.

I’ve lost some family members and friends, some have told me I am disgusting (church family) and should be taken out back and shot like a dog, and all (FAGS) should be I was told that we need to be killed for we were evil. (this was a more redneck friend who lives is the infamous Jasper, Texas) which I lived briefly and didn’t fit in to long.
But I have been told various degrees in the church. I do not attend very often or rarely. I sometimes attended non-domination churches and give my time money to various causes I support (pride Houston, Houston Equal Rights Alliance, Equity Texas, HRC and various affirming or glbt friendly church’s such as the metropolitan community church)

I converted about 5 or so years ago I did feel overly pressured into joining, even though my ultra-right wing conservative die hard southern redneck right wing upbringing I joined and converted and felt overly pressured but had some faith and beliefs . little did some know my reason was to hide my trans gender feelings and inner self? I had spirits of hate, and even far right neo-Nazi background.

I did sometimes between my rough young adult hood, be self-distractive out of personal insecurities, I had started seeking counseling for my gender issues.
I grew up in a small town (Harvey,LA) but moved around often to do family and problems with me as a unhappy child. a suburb that was not to heavily damaged by hurricane Katrina outside New Orleans, LA. I prayed for the storms to destroy the area so I could have e a reason to transfer get away from the Latter day saint church. I transferred to Houston, TX become active but some abusive co-workers who I went to high school with abused me at the workplace, beat me up do to thrills of knowing I had no local ties, and threatening to out me as trans gender I started drinking heavy, smoking heavy and my apartment felt like a prison. My work performance declined. They threaten to out me to my folks, family and friends. I would not stand up for myself do to personal, family and religious insecurities.

I eventfully got hurt on the job, burned out in a failed OD suicide attempt I was knocked out for a few days and a month on painkillers, I never drove drunk but was ok in my life. I did some bad things and said things, and blamed others and continued to be self-distrtuvive lost a scholarship I worked hard to due to the folks abusing me and intimidating me lived in my apartment complex.

I served some time in the Harris county jail, for a terroristic thereat (verbal thereat like disorderly conduct or CLASS B misdemeanor and resisting arrest. I was kicked and hit with a tazer over 50-100 times. I moved to (Montrose) known as the glbt section of town. I am out to my family, friends and church (to their disapproval) due to the fact I want to go into media and activism and eventfully work in ind pendant media or as a journalist. I enjoy traveling and do not like flying or cruse ships (confined spaces and germs) I also enjoy rving and would like small plane piloting boating or chartered flights, given when moving here I was arrested later for some unpaid traffic warrants out of state that were cleared but not cleared in NCIC do to backed up paper work of the local govt and city and state of Louisiana. During this time 2-3 years ago I spent time in a now closed (city jail) for the reason of a terboculus outbreak and the jail was locked down by the health department and the federal govt.

I made bad choices became a drunk my work performance slid down the tubes. During my drinking, drug abuse but (never driving on the job) I burned out, hurt a lot of folks locally with poor words, drunken fits and rage and I was self destructive out of self-hatred for myself, and un-acceptance.

I also am more civil libertarian, and green party and more right wing on some issues than the mainstream GLBT community. I am more open and agree with you on your views of polygamy in the old days of the church. I am more right wing on some sexual issues as well and prefer monogamous relationships. And family. I believe at current my records are at the Brays Bayou YSA ward in Houston (near the galleria) But I rarely attend and if so just briefly for part of the first meeting.

I do plan to move on day to Dallas or Austin but dream of retiring in rural Montana in a small border town not on most maps, is my big dream in the cold, wilderness and rural obscurity. I do like hiking, the outdoors, camping, backpacking, skydiving, bungee jumping. And fitness.

I don’t dislike people with money but hate people who are born into privilege and do not know what it means to labor. I even if I won the lottery (I confess I play) I would not want things of wealth, power and privilege I am a big do it your-self type person, and if I cant or fail than I seek help (I don’t like to admit being wrong but I am honest even brutally honest) I like firearms, but Don’t like war, I am huge supporter of the first and 2nd amendments.

Yes, I agree “single” and “dating” are often misunderstood. In the GLBT arena. I hit rough times and things have gotten better for me of late, but still have struggles ahead on the road to life and transition.

I utterly shocked others given from 16-25 or I was a very manly man, I tried so hard to fit in but was in pain and misery. and Just broke down in the fall of 2006 and Could not take it anymore. I had tried to go toward transition and being out open and ok but honestly was unhappy with myself, life and being who I am.

I burned out starting to drink more, during this period of 2005-2007 I drank heavy, was drinking in the first time in a bar in my life in Christmas 2005, I drank off and on went though a religious phase, a neo Nazi skin head phase in jasper and tomball. I went though the ups and downs. Met folks some seedy moonlighted in bars and nightclubs some briefly as hired help or finding people wanting to purchase drugs,

I found many folks up and down than found the present now. Had a few interrelationships almost went to Iraq as a trucker and got married which I would have been unhappy with and had many ups and downs and pitfalls around.

I also for the longest time had trouble with being honest and becoming a habitual lier, and insecure with myself and where I was and wanted to go in life, and being self-distributive. It is painful to compose this but I have due to honesty and desire for change.

I suspect my family has known or suspected as my former foster parents were, not totally surprised or my former caseworker given some things in thereby and discussed prior and that was privileged in my youth, I every and sometimes out of rebelliously of trans genders younger than I and transsexuals that have blended in at my age or younger. A lot of dark regrets and remorse burns in my soul.

But the truth be told, I have grow broken free of the system and have been born again. Thats my story, thats lee.

As of late Ive become aware of the possibility that my mother was a drunk, a dry drunk and may have drunk and to be in the dramma off and on through my childhood. And youth before I moved out. I

McInnis Lee Gaetjens

Po Box 66471

Houston, Texas 77266-6471

09/30/07

My early child hood when my mother lead my father, I moved back to the southern states during this time the year of 1983. My father than came in and out of AA and the program.

My early childhood memories are odd and obscure, I always felt out of place, confused like I did not belong or something wasn’t right or I wasn’t right. Somethings Missing out of place, one of my early st memories is around age 3 or 4 or 5 or so when moving back to the south from the bay area. My early sit childhood memories my mother was hard on me, my mother fought often with my right-wing grandmother, my mother was as full of panic and disorder and drama and unhappy as I am now.

But one of my early memories of being out of place, or wrong on not much myself, is when I was little one of my first happy memories is playing with someone posing for a coffin and someone else and doing other odd things for my mothers lawyer whom she made life difficult for my dad in recovery, played games and also given the fact my father grew up in New York City and didn’t drive for many years and still doesn’t largely. She moved things made things hard for him in a cab, and bus service. He stayed at the YMCA given his early soberer.

I hallways felt out of place in early childhood one of my closet early friends and only given my mothers overly protective, paranoia, OCD upbring and excessive and obscure childhood I had and lack of socialization and allowing me to grow out of fear of my big evil father or the big bad bully, my mother often isolated me and didn’t let me develop or grow due to paranoia and overly promotive and unreality goals and lacked to give me any independence and or freedom or enjoy simple childhood pleasures.

Anyway one of my first memories beyond my acting and flower and dead thing for my moms legal assistant or witness or noter that was present for dealings related to the divorce and custody dispute whom she bashed my father, who cleaned up and she made his life very difficult. Was my great uncle HJM (Hugh Judge McAuliffe) whom was a very hard ass old timer with the big car, johnny cash fan, and more very conservative right wing stubborn piggish, but to make a long story short, urning this time he lived with my aunt AM (allice mcaullife) and my cousins (Christiana arbor and her friends would come over after school and My gender exploration began there but also in of all places the old timers sears catalogs I would spend hours on ends, fantasying of being a girl starching into sears catalogs for hours on end.

In other new my family never really thought I developed much into a boyish or boyish, I devloped more trying to fit in though my latter teen and young adult years though blue shirt america. And runing around with blue shirt labor groups.

While being pushed for acting out, or being left in a tree, or being pushed into games or activities of logic or being pushed into things or activity’s my over protective mother would disapprove with HJM AM DLG (Daniel lee gay) or PMG (Patrica McAuliffe Gay) that I could get away more with murder or things were not allowed.

Further more though my twisted family, religious twists, personal issues and screwed up childhood, and struggling since I was 5 years old with the sears fantasy and long hours in the bathroom reading but with the catalog.

The reality is I have grown beyond that years of suffering and denial I hurt, badly for denying myself vocal opinion, I never knew in Overly protected religious secular right upbringing that there was a thing as Gender Identity and Transsexuals or much more than I converted to The Latter Day Saint faith, and did self-destructive actions to others. And doing distributive things to my life. I used work, over-work, and buying my temporary happiness, for example my pickup-truck, vacations, travels were just temporary fixes, than one night while in fear to go home, I was invited to and discovered bar hopping and drinking and the wonders of medication and cure with drinking in Houston.

I hated drunks, in my early to later teen years was around sub stand abuse, drinking after I left my folks, in early child-hood I was cultured, middle to upper class, and knew so much and than started to well work hard and be someone I wasn’t though backbreaking, hard manual labor, self drive and self-reservation I worked myself to death, Had faith in something to cure my feelings, and destroyed my life. Eventfully upon Transferring to Houston. I over-worked and burned out when I worked for a manger named Ray Gonzales who cleaned houses of un-profitable stores for my company, was a big wig in the woodlands, and more paranoid and dysfunctional and rumored despite being a big wig right wing rep, married and with kids and a die hard right wing ultra-Conservative roman catholic was gay, but lived a double life with customers and employees and his number two co-manager was rumored to be gay. And half the store was GLBT on various levels some more out than others further adding to my fears of

To further complicate things my Transfer here was less than joyful, the company was going through hard times the stock price was down a Hireling freeze was in effect. Corners were being cut everywhere the infamous movie was being filmed, the tire and lube people were being split across the board drowning the end. And in worse fashion the people who when I was finally promoted after spending a summer outdoors alone 90% of the time working in the hottest summer in Houston with a burn ban.

I got promoted to a worse job inside, in an abusive hard and verbally and physically abusive era in the workplace, at home, and blackmailed and extorted and set up. And shortly afterward discovered drinking after my home, house and insecurity’s were invited.

I than after becoming hurt at work, burned out and with my poor conduit discovered and preferred drinking drama, and physically and verbally abusive relationships, I further destroyed myself by terroristic law enforcement, citizens, and being hostile to getting help, and hate, racism given the people who abused me largely were black and has panic, I was the token white back there, they later found out one night about me attending mcc, when they beat me up off property and I hid and hid and hit with one of the letters you gave me. I had an alarm event (police panic at my old apartment) when they beat me up there, and rattled the window and vandalized my truck on a few occasions, abused, and intimated me in the community to try and get terroristic actions out of me, when I could no longer do so, I cared little about my life, hit the bottle club, debit, bills, and work became lacking, I bitched and bitched and bitch about life but did little to further it, I further terrorized the local community and others friends family members and acquaintances by doing self-destructive actions, lieing, drinking and using people than pushing them away from me destroying the relationships and ruining my life, and eventfully my scholarship for collage to fulfill my life long dream.

I still often miss my family, friends and former people who cared and try to help

I was born Jan 18th, 1981 to my parents Martin Clark Gaetjens & Kathryn Kathleen McInnis Gay McAuliffe at Kaiser foundation Hospital, at 2:03 am i n the morning PST. I was a quick and emergency c-section I was blue due to lack of air to the brain and a Emergency C-section but alive and in good spirits regardless of the cord being warped around my neck 3 times. I was born in the era before ultrasounds were norm, or mainstream, when blood work took hours, and you didn’t have wide spread computers and before databases, the Internet and digital Lifestyle and cell phones, PDAs and pagers, FAX machines and blackberry’s were the part of every day life, before 24 hour cable news, I remember the 80s of my childhood. its who I am and my favorite time and a the end of a simpler era before the big tech boom.

I was born Jan 18th, 1981 to lovering good parents who in conflict used me to fight and split located at Kaiser Foundation Hospital in Oakland, CA. My Mother was Born and Raised in New Orleans, Louisiana as My dad was born and raised in New York City, New York State.

I was born at approx. 2:03 AM (PST) a traumatic birth, I was kicking and had swung myself around again, it was fast approaching my time to join the world, in the early 1980s (the birth of the digital age was still in infancy) Ultrasounds, cat scans and things we take for granted and sometimes love and love to hate were reserved for the few and elite and very very expensive, pricey and not covered by my mothers and fathers insurance and largely viewed as a novelty medical device due to the limited availability, the high cost of computer power and digital imaging ( we are still in the dark ages and the birth though not boom of personal computing)

I had turned myself around and My life might be in danger, my mother had to choose to wait for X-rays (you still used film and the process took time you had to manually develop in those days and have a actually tech not a computer do the work for you the days of skilled labor, and unions were still here) My mothers gut and parenting instinct told her to go into labor, and not wait for the tests which was a very good thing, I was an emergency C-section at the time (modern medicine of the late 70s and early 80s discouraged c-sections) I was born blue and not breathing but early Regan era medicine saved my life.

I had a childhood of conflict, my mother had left New Orleans fairly liberal in the 1960s, my uncle (who later became more my father figure my moms brother) left for Texas, which I would later follow in his footsteps. My father is very far left liberal and new York can be more right wing left the slums of the Bronx which was different from today and people like jerry orbach and others grew up in the Bronx in his era.

My mother moved around the west coast Portland, or, Richmond, ca when (I was born) redneck town in a blue state. Same with Houston and Texas there is blue you just have to know where to look much more blue than in New Orleans.

My mom left my father and came back 3 times before going to separation, My father had a drinking problem and as a child there is much to be disputed (it sucks when parents bring the kids into the equation) I honestly believe after uncovering things during my mothers death that she was to blame as much as My dad, they were different people who were not right for each other but tried to do the best for me but the blood and booze spilled.

I have felt conflict with my gender from a very young age roughly beginning around age 3-5 years of age, which begins my separating my parent’s fights and ultimately leading to going home to sweet old Harvey, Louisiana in Jefferson parish.

I think my earliest memory is I always as a younger child fit in more with the girls, and latter was more obscure from a lack of socializing and overly protective mother, afraid of my father and others (allegedly he sent a P.I. to hunt us down or a hit man or some bullshit) I think parents out of bad digressions do bad and stupid things, I feel my father gave up, and my mother shut him out, they both did their parts to hurt and lie on each other, and hurt me in the process.

I had a rough childhood, history of dalliance, good upbringing, my family has a large catholic background, and my mom quit practicing, and also had much conflict with my grandmother in my early childhood, and young adult hood and early pre-teen years.

I was subjected to beatings punishments for my arrogances and stupidity and destructive and obscene and profanity and sinful actions in my youth. I had been beaten, and even was called evil and sinful.

I think a lot of parents want to protect their children but I was overly protected and overly sheltered in my youth to the point of being naive though young adult-hood and even into adulthood partially.

I think my first remembrance of feeling like a girl, was when I was 3 or 5 so years old when my mother returned here and was “hiding” from my big evil dad. With her atty and lawyer in my family’s “empty” that my mom, my uncle and (adopted sister) were raised in house uptown New Orleans in Broadmor which some may know better given its coverage during Katrina.

We were in there waiting for my dad to show up. I think my mom often played games with my father and wanted to win custody and wanted out of the marriage out of poor taste, unhappiness, or homesickness, or maybe wanting the best for me. I believe to some degree my father wanted the best for me but gave up, I don’t trust nor distrust him to much today, but he is my flesh and blood and we share some similar DNA.

I think my father sometimes says one thing but actions, and words and cause and effect, as my mother was just as equity guilty in a lot of my life as were many other people.

My memory goes to some point of waiting for a lawyer, I think she had a little girl with her or her nanny stopped by to see her or something (cell phones were rare, pricey and prestige to yuppies, millionaires and drug dealers and generally installed in cars with the like curry cord most people or working class doctors, cops, fire ems used pagers and pay phones in those days if you could afford one or be issued one)

Regardless I think we played some or it may have been a neighbor, it was fun and enjoyable, I think I played dead and held a rose some sort of neo-Gothic romance thing blah. And look at me today.

Regardless as I grew up I got in trouble, but was generally moralistic, but acted out a lot, I had a troubled child hood, which I would later find out to have suffered brain damage at birth to the left frontal lobe, I also I think the local Houston company Medtronic’s was to a trail which never met FDA approval to try and repair my damaged brain nodes but failed and they still struggle the FDA does not conceder it safe and an elective surgery. I also struggled with speech and being or having social contact due to a very overly protective mother.

Moving forward I go to the school years, I fit in but was often alone and troubled an unhappy youth, I did sometimes in early childhood play with girls and make friends, and even had a few kiddies’ girl friends in childhood. Blah. Obscurity the house where she lived across from were I played as a kiddle was and still is there she was a army brat and where my school was now stands some yuppie new homes as about built in my high school years.

I trough pre-teen and young adult hood and early to mid childhood started gender bending as some would call and even ado lance. My family “caught” me a member as a child never spoke to it to others but did beat me well for doing such a “wrong” thing. I had a more ultra-right wing conservative GREAT-uncle not the uncle who was like my father he was more like a grandfather but very stubborn and right wing.
I had a great-aunt who growing up was like a grandmother but she was much older than my grandmother, and my grandmother kept her youth in appearance even to today to some degree despite her health problems.

I also began watching other girls wishing I could be them but In puzzlement did not understand given my right wing upbringing and roots, in south east Louisiana. I found a new self-reflection but in utter puzzlement, I spent some of my youth at night going to sleep dreaming of waking up in a new body, something about that felt right and something about what was wrong is now and that is correct. But things of that nature are taboo and get your ass kicked but religious right wing zealots, My mother was ok with long hair, but others did not like it and wanted nothing to do with me unless I cut it, did not like playing and ran firm 1920s discipline. I had a slightly though good natured loving side, but with turmoil inner I had a destructive, rebellious side sort of a Mr. Hyde and miss nice gal personality or something of that nature.

Even to this day, with my nice outgoing, caring giving personality, very friendly and trusting and stubborn and procrastinator self, it hides my true self, for so many years my hard work, risk taking, warehousing, and taking dumb risks and dumb luck I tired for all to hard and long to be a man, sure I may have attended glbt support groups, I converted to LDS or Mormonism as its commonly known to deny my own true self.

While I had searched for some peace within myself, I often wanted more and joined for the wrong reasons, I agree LDS folk are good kind, trustworthy folks but lost and misguided.

I remember in my young adulthood 18+ being misguided. And my mother and I and with my family rocky relationship and after her death 2 weeks after 9-11-2001 on my uncles birthday on September 25th that same year of the infamous terrorist attacks. Which ironically by birth and coming out and also becoming a terrorist myself or according to the state of Texas would be on the same year.

I’m very weary of dates, places, and parts to my life, and family. Given the past 3 deaths in my family have been on relatives birthdays. I lost and loose a lot for myself, and life.

I often find and even growing up secretly continued my cross-dressing, but as adalonace hit in I often tried the hardest to fit in and for many many years hid my true feelings about my true self, this is almost 10 years lieing to myself and trying to forget and hide myself or do a cure for all and pretend to be a real, man. I was not or will ever be.

I later in teenage years became very obese I over ate became unhappy, with myself, my body, my gender and my sexuality something felt broken I felt wrong sinful and shameful, joining the Latter Day Saint (Mormon) church made me feel worse.

I often even under the silly jokes and even today with my outgoingness live a dark, twisted depressed and lonely and unhappy life to this date.

I further have the foresight of being born in the early digital age, when tech was still well not as widespread in everyday life and living as is today, manual pricing guns were common place, the day before the infamous UPC codes and development of the digital age, when telephone calling was new, 900, 976 numbers were the big deal as far as scams the Internet had not grown outside the think tanks, university’s, and corporate networks and government and civil servants, and on line services like Gene, Compuserve, etc were the big deal.

Mobile phones were per minute, leased and if lucky bought. And amongst the privileged and powerful and developed . In other development the life I lived and grew was myself and growing into true self shows today, stuck behind a 300 baud dumb terminal, or if lucky an ISDN line or leased government line and access to FAX machines and older drum built like a tank copy machines were commonplace.

The world developed much and fast into myself, and boredom, I read into books, available my life is grown into a cesspool of faith, power and development.

My time in Houston was well intentioned, but I burned out and maybe wasn’t ready and the drink, dance, club and bottle and smoke became my medication for almost the entire 2.5 years in Texas.

I spent My life most of my life doing, pretending to fit in, crossed lines and boundaries and myself, my self-steam pretending, believing something I am not and living as someone I am not, when I burned out with my job, forklift accident, work, and abuse and personal insecurity I learned to be myself, become myself through the bottle and cesspool of booze and grow into the bottle for myself and others and to become m